拽妹黛薇儿第一季

This is my stop

Got to get off

I might go pop

Excuse me

I’ve got to be direct

If I’m off, please correct

You’re standing on my neck

Question one: “Self-esteem is important because…”

It’s a quality that will stand us in good stead for the rest of our lives.

Very good. Now, “The next time I start to feel bad about myself…”

Stand before the mirror, look myself in the eye and say,

“You are special. No one else is like you.”

You two really have been pay attention! Okay, “There is no such thing…”

As the right weight.

Or the right height.

There’s only what’s right for me.

Because me is who I am.

When you’re popular, all unpopular people look like anyway.

I was ready to go before we got here.

Can’t talk now. I’m chairing a meeting of the Resting Quietly Club.

You’re good. When you put your mind to it, you’re very, very good.

The world was once again safe for democracy.

She said it was wrong to encourage cheaters and to profit from them.

So, she is giving up being a lawyer?

I asked her that,

And I’m sure someday we’ll once again be on speaking terms.

May I be excused?

I’d like to go to the girl’s room and vomit up breakfast.

Could you remove your glasses?

Could you remove your halter top?

I can’t take my glasses off.

I need them to see scam artists.

I supposed you realize that now I have to reconsider my position.

Does no one have any ethics anymore?

How do we know that what you tell us is the truth?

You don’t. And that’s the greatest lession of all.

Boy, she was really trying to make you insecure.

I know. If I didn’t have such low self-esteem, she might have gotten to me.

I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this, and I’ll deny I ever said it.

Do you think I’d be out here letting you try and teach me how to be cool?

I’d like to pay my check to society and get on with my life.

Bureaucracy is the price we pay for impartiality.

Nobody said the justice system would be fair.

The only thing actually worse than reading is watching somebody else read.

Dad, these tired bones maybe locked behind prison walls,

But when I play this rusty old harp, my soul flies free as a bird.

I don’t care. It’s been too long already.

I’ve paid my debt.

That’s right. I’m busting out.

Mom and Dad are taking the night off from being jailers,

So I’m taking the night off, too.

The confinement has made me desperate.

If I don’t get out, I’m afraid I might do something crazy.

So, basically, you’ve convinced them that you were to dull to be worth grounding.

Exactly, and the sad thing is, it’s kinda true.

Reality is bizarre enough for me.

Pass me a guitar string so that I might silence my friend.

You don’t need any more holes in your head.

Now my day’s complete.

Do you ever feel like maybe you’re all wasting your life?

Only when I’m awake.

A healthy happy family comes before work. Always.

Dammit! It’s my turn to say dammit!

I hope the raging envy you’re feeling won’t affect our friendship.

No way to contact the outside world! What a luxury.

If you don’t mind, I’m gonna crawl back into myself for a while.

That’s good, honey. You’re letting out some of that tension.

Why couldn’t he just love me for who I was?

My eyes are too blurry to read it.

Quinn, everywhere you look you see doors opening.

Everywhere your father looks, he sees doors closing.

A long corridor of door slamming shut, and at the very end,

There is one open door,

He must someday enter…and never may he return.

Rely on Mother’s hypocrisy to see us through this crisis.

I don’t like to smile unless I have a reason.

Daria, people judge you by your expressions.

Yes, and I believe there is something intrinsically wrong with that system,

And have dedicated myself to change it.

You must have worked very hard to become such a colossal jerk so quickly.

Maybe his death hit a little too close to home?

Gee, I hope this doesn’t lower your opinion of me.

Now he’s dead and I feel bad but I don’t feel that bad so I feel terrible!

You’re worried that you’re not as nice a person as you thought.

Boy, Daria, nothing gets through to you, does it.

To make something positive come out of this devastating event.

I’m not anybody, and I’d like to talk to someone.

But you’ve been talking to everyone.

No, everyone’s been talking to me. There’s a difference.

When they say, “You are always unhappy, Daria,”

What they mean is, “You think Daria”.

I can tell because you don’t smile.

Now this guy died and it makes me think

And that hurts my little head and makes me stop smiling.

So, tell me how you cope with thinking all the time, Daria,

Until I can get back to my normal vegetable state.”

Well, I don’t like it when I say people should die and then they do.

I don’t want that kind of responsibility.

It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

Find some other way to feel. Then you won’t feel sad.

You just made ten bucks off of that poor girl’s suffering.

Yeah. That was wrong.

Really. Next time…

Twenty.

最近真是狂看高中生剧，euphoria里的美国teenager已经进化成某个奇幻樱桃物种了，还是Daria里的90‘s高中校园更让人亲切……

想起寒假回去老王家胡嗨，老王说起前几天高中同学讲到一些陈年八卦，老王表示“为什么我啥都不知道？？？”

该同学表示“你当然不知道，你高中天天跟那谁钻小图书馆么不是！”

well，“那谁”就是我。高中是一个漫长到看不到头的Daria期，戴着厚厚的眼镜，如无必要，勿添表情，每天回家啃《旧唐书》、《战争与和平》，爱好是看满屏血肉的HBO和食品加工视频。

因为几乎从来不参与任何青春期罗曼游戏，班里大大小小的热门男女都来找过我，倾诉一些微妙的感情，或者微妙的虚荣，再或者微妙的寂寞。

应试教育文化当然让我显得没那么misery，但我知道这不过是在miserably wasting my time。高三用一些博弈论给自己博到了一间空教室，现在想到做完一套化学题，猛然抬头看到电扇下灰尘漂浮的瞬间，金黄色的春天的灰尘，还是会在心里笑一笑。

有个规律是，保险牌总向往着掀翻牌桌，所以Daria们总会遇到Trent这样的人。怎么形容呢，大概就是所有高中生都把他当作是放射陨石时，我却看到了他划过天空的美妙轨迹。可惜我的认知让我不能忽略一个宇宙论的事实：这轨迹来自光年外，所以光芒死于百亿年前。眼看他楼塌了，去废墟中捡砖块为他建一个微缩堡垒，做了些这样的事情。

看到第一季末的时候想到很多故事，可能因为Daria这句话：

“So, tell me how you cope with thinking all the time, Daria, until I can get back to my normal vegetable state.”

“那谁”当时也是这么转译自己的社交功能的，事实证明这么多年过去了，嫩芽们长成老菜，“那谁”还在沉默地思考着。

It all boils down to trust. I don't have low self-esteem. It's a mistake. I have low esteem for everyone else. She doesn't get it. It's the Royal Family. You'd have to be blind. Good point. People as sane and rational as you and I, who come simply to satisfy a normal curiosity. You seem pretty comfortable with the brain-dead. So, let's go to a party.

起初以为拽妹是工作党，没想到如此敢于拽的黛薇儿只是一介高中生。

依旧是翻译引进时如果剧名是人名，一定要修改一番。有时候如神来之笔，有时候也会给人带来误解。黛薇儿并非拽，而是过早洞悉人性后的通透，她就像我们读书时期班级里总会有的那款幽暗孤僻的小女生，独来独往，思维清奇，只不过她是一个理想化身，你以为她是孤僻，其实她只是不想随波逐流，对于虚假的归属感有清晰认识，不屑于与人争高下，“如果你认为1+2=12，你说得对”。

发现美式动漫大多这种调性，总有毒舌且丧的主角，有无脑乐子人，有刻薄但是稍微正常的。

（下载的资源字幕有错误截图已订正）

当你想问题想到和Daria一样通透的时候确实很难再笑出来了吧。大一那年第一次深入思考存在性问题的时候我陷入虚无主义的深渊之中，最后选择自救就索性放弃了这个议题。可是Daria不觉得自己miserable，一个不放弃思考并且和愚蠢的世界和平相处的高中生...我也想给她10刀给我上一课